Rose's Letters
by The Captains Girlie
Summary: Rose writes a letter to The Doctor about how she feels. Angsty but cute Doctor/Rose story. Rated K. Spoilers for Series 1& 2 of DW. I do not own Doctor Who, Characters or songs used in this story.
1. The One Adventure You Could Never Have

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Doctor Who. If I did, The Doctor would have ripped apart the universe to get Rose back.

**Pairings: **The Doctor/Rose Tyler

**Summary: **Rose writes a letter to The Doctor to tell him how she feels.

**Rated: **K- Suitable for everyone! Woo!

**A/N:**It's a little bit angsty but very cute! Just a one-shot I did ages ago but never posted. I could turn it into a series, I have a few ideas…depending if you like it or not… feedback is gold! Also just to let you know, for those of you that read my series 'Gwen's Story'; I've nearly finished the first chapter of the sequel 'Ethan- about Jack and Ianto's son Ethan. Sorry it's taken so long! Anyway…back to the fic…Enjoy!

Doctor,

How do I start? Yes, I'm writing a letter to a man who showed me the world- literally- a man who I will never see again! I feel like a right idiot, writing this. I know you're never gonna get this letter, never gonna read it, but, well, I just have to say this somehow.

It's been one day since I last saw you, in Norway. What you said…what you didn't say…I just wanted to let you know that it doesn't matter. In my heart, I knew it all along. I don't want to be presumptuous here but I knew you were going to say it back. And I appreciate how hard that must have been for you. I remember that time with Sarah-Jane when you told me, well; I remember exactly what you said…

"I don't age. I regenerate. But humans decay. You wither and you die. Imagine watching that happen to someone that you, I…"

"What, Doctor?" I replied, a little too angrily, I fear.

"You can spend the rest of your life with me... but I can't spend the rest of mine with you. I have to live on. Alone. That's the curse of the Time Lords."

At the time, I didn't really appreciate what you were trying to say, but now I understand. You're afraid to love in case you lose the person who you love. That's why you never went back for Sarah-Jane, isn't it? It's easier for you knowing that you dropped her off home to get on with her life, and that one day you might be able to see her again. Not admitting to yourself that one day she will die and you will never see her again.

Everything is hard for you. You're just not one of those people who can sit back and watch, live a quiet life…however much you would like to. And after you, I don't think I am either. Except that's what I have to do now. You told me it was "The one adventure I could never have"- and I don't want to have it either, not without you.

Another thing I remember from meeting Sarah Jane was when we were talking about you and your little habits that made us laugh…all your technobabble, stroking the TARDIS...God I miss you. She also told me, when you couldn't hear, that "some things are worth getting your heart broken for". And do you know what? I think she was right. I don't regret ine second. I'd do it all again, even knowing what weas going to happen.

The second adventure we ever went on together, when we went to Cardiff in 1869- God, it seems like just yesterday, even though so much has happened- It was a snowy Christmas Eve and we met Charles Dickens- Charles Dickens! And we both thought we were gonna die and you took my hand- like the first time we met- and smiled and said "I'm so glad I met you". I hope you meant that, I hope you are still glad you met me. Because, boy, I'm so glad I met you!

You do infuriate me sometimes though. Like the time we defeated the Daleks, before you regenerated; you sent me home. I was sat in London, eating chips, with Mickey and mum, while you and Jack were out there fighting for your lives! I felt so useless, so weak. And on that stupid emergency programme one message you left me you told me to "have a fantastic life". But that is what I was doing- I was having a fantastic life with you. But I undertsand why you did it, my mum can be pretty scary when she wants to be! I did the right thing though, coming back to you. Coming back to my Doctor.

When you regenerated, God I was so scared, the man I trusted most in the world had changed. He changed his face, his voice, his personality- but your heart was still there. (I should say hearts really shouldn't I?) And you didn't wake up and the world was ending and there was nothing I could do- yet again. But then you came and saved the day. The new you, the new rude and not ginger you.

I can't help but cry. I've always been an empathetic person, I think you know that more than anyone else…sometimes you go too far and now I wonder how you cope without me pulling you back. To be honest I'm probably kidding myself. I bet you've got a new companion, someone prettier and cleverer than me… how could you not? I don't hate you for it either, I just wish that things had been different...the battle of chanary wharf plagues my dreams every night.

I think of you all throughout the day and at night I think of the time when we were so cruelly torn apart. I think that there were so many more adventures left to have, so much we could have done, but I don't have one regret. I hope you don't either. For now I'm just going to have to carry on, day after day, without you.

I feel like a piece of me has died now that you've gone. You consumed my life, you changed me, you showed me a better way of living. Thank you.

And doctor? I love you.

Rose Tyler x


	2. Please Remember Me

Dear Doctor,

**Disclaimer: **I'm not making any money from this and I don't own Doctor Who. If I did I would be hiding in a corner, completely embarrassed by Series 4's premiere.

**Pairings: **The Doctor/Rose, slight Pete/Jackie, Rose/Mickey

**Summary****: **Rose writes to The Doctor again, she doesn't know why though. He'll never get them.

**Rated: **K

**A/N: **Decided to make it into a series, as the first one seemed quite popular!Angsty but reminiscent and cute! Also the song is 'Please Remember Me' which you can find on John Barrowman's album. It's a good song, but I obviously do not own it! Comments for cookies….

Dear Doctor,

I don't know why I'm writing another letter. It's stupid really, isn't it? But somehow, I feel like I'm holding onto you. That you're still here. But you're not, are you? You're gone, forever. The one thing that brought us together tore us apart; Time and Space. How ironic. I miss you everyday; I miss your cheeky smile, your shining eyes, and your techno babble speeches. Yeah, I miss the travelling, the adventures, the new planets and the aliens; but I miss you more.

It's been a few months since we said goodbye. I've stopped crying myself to sleep now, but don't think I've forgotten you. Everything I do reminds me of you; especially working at Torchwood. I'm quite high up actually. Obviously it helps that my dad runs the place; but also my knowledge on other planets and the way I deal with them. You taught me that Doctor. You also taught me what it means to be human.

Those Cybermen, the day they took me away from you I wished I could be like one of them; No emotions, no pain, no hurt. But that first time in the parallel universe, you taught me that emotions are what make us human. And that's what makes me human; you and my empathy. They kind of go hand in hand.

"Tell me Doctor, have you known grief, rage and pain?"

You told him, you told John Lumic that they hurt. And they do, you're right. But I, like you, would rather die without them. So Doctor, don't grieve for me. Don't be angry at what happened. But I hope you remember me, as I will remember you.

Before you came along I used to wake up in the morning; go to work; eat chips; go to bed; and do the same thing the next day. You showed me a better way of living, the better person I could be. I always wonder why you did it. Why did you ask me to come with you? Why did you care for me? Why did you trust me? But then I ask myself the same questions; Why did I go with you? Why did I care for you? Why did I trust you? The honest answer? I don't know. I truly don't know. I feel like we had some bond, from the very first moment I set eyes on you.

Between us we had this, jokey sense of humour. Everything was fun to us. Until it got serious of course, but even then, you could help me light up the room with your wit. Mickey pointed this out to me. That time when we…when we were on that spaceship with France on it. I remember it all, like it was yesterday.

I said "Oh, here comes trouble, what you been up to?"

"Oh, this and that. Became the imaginary friend of a future French aristocrat, picked a fight with a clockwork man...met a horse" you replied.

"What's a horse doing on a spaceship?" Mickey asked, baffled. I don't think he quite got it like we did.

"Mickey, what's _pre-revolutionary France_ doing on a spaceship? Get a little perspective." You do make me laugh.

But that's it with you. Laughing, joking. It's all a façade. A stupid façade of your bloody secrets and hidden emotions…which you don't realise until it's too late! How could you do that to me? I may love you, but I love you so much it hurts. And they do say you have to hate someone to love them. And sometimes I did hate you. There goes those emotions again!

Pre-revolutionary France. Pff, like you cared about pre-revolutionary France. All you cared about was yourself. You and that silly Reinette. I know that you cracking that mirror, would save the world, but it also meant that you left me. You didn't even say goodbye. You're good at that. You were just going to leave me and Mickey stranded on that spaceship while you were off galavanting with Reinette Poisson. But you did come back, luckily for me.

Do you know what she said to me, that Reinette of yours? She said 'But you and I both know, don't we, Rose? The Doctor is worth the monsters.' And she was right. Always bloody right. I'm not angry anymore. Of course there were times when I was but not now. Now I just want you. Like I said, don't be angry at what happened, and nor will I.

You've got to live on Doctor. Day by day, having new adventures, because that's how it's meant to be. Have new companions, new strories to tell, new people to be angry at you. Life has to go on, and that's what I'm doing. That's what we're doing. Mum, Dad, Mickey and me. And my new baby brother or sister when it comes along. We are all so lucky to have met you, to have let you come into our lives, we're all better people because of it.

I hope I made you a better person too, or I hope I at least affected your life in some way. I heard a song the other day; a song that entirely sums up what I feel, and what I want to say to you.

_When all our tears have reached the sea,  
Part of you will live in me,  
Way down deep inside my heart.  
The days keep coming without fail,  
A new wind is gonna find your sail,  
That's where your journey starts._

You'll find better love,  
Strong as it ever was,  
Deep as the river runs,  
Warm as the morning sun.  
Please remember me.

Just like the waves down by the shore,  
We're gonna keep on coming back for more.  
Cause we don't ever wanna stop,  
Out in this brave new world you seek,  
O'er the valleys and the peaks,  
And I can see you on the top.

You'll find better love,  
Strong as it ever was,  
Deep as the river runs,  
Warm as the morning sun.  
Please remember me.

Remember me when you're out walking,  
When snow falls high outside your door,  
Late at night when you're not sleeping,  
And moonlight falls across your floor.  
I can't hurt you anymore.

You'll find better love,  
Strong as it ever was,  
Deep as the river runs,  
Warm as the morning sun.  
Please remember me.

Love always and forever,

Rose Tyler x


End file.
